John Edwards Sees Dead People??

15 06 2008

After John Edwards dropped out of the presidential race, I was bummed.  He was my #1 choice despite the fact that my brain kept saying “please not another southern white guy”!  His message was spot on, and that’s what mattered.  So, imagine how jazzed I was when my significant other sitting at the computer calls out, “John Edwards is coming to Anchorage???” 

Me: (eyes bugging out of head)  What?  Are you sure? 

SO: (earnestly)  I’m looking right here at Craig’s list and someone wants a John Edwards ticket!

Me: Is it the Anchorage Craig’s list?

SO:  Yes!  Look!  John Edward ticket for $185!

Me:  Edward?  or Edwards?

SO: Oh. 

Me: (frantic Google search for “John Edwards Anchorage”.  Please let it be true…. A site pops up.  John Edward in Anchorage tickets available!) He has captivated audiences worldwide.  He uses his unique abilities to connect people with loved ones who have passed on. (HUH?)  Discover the comforting and hopeful message of this world-famous medium, best-selling author and renowned motivational figure.  AAAARGH!

Obviously a case of mistaken identity.  So much for that.  That was the shortest emotional roller-coaster ever. Up-Up-UUUP-splat. 

Well, there has been talk of Obama coming to Alaska, which would certainly give Mark Begich or any other Democratic Congressional hopeful a great bump.  If I were Obama, I’d come up here just to make sure I didn’t have to work with Stevens or Young.  Ever.  Maybe John Edwards could tag along for fun?

 





Barack Obama Comes to Alaska!

11 05 2008

That’s the headline I want to read in the Anchorage Daily News.

Let’s pretend we’re Barack Obama, and weigh the pros and cons.

The Cons:

  • The state has been red for most residents’ living memory. No state has voted fewer times for a Democratic presidential candidate.
  • We have a paltry 3 electoral votes out of 538 nationally in the presidential election.
  • He’d have to use a whole lot of frequent flier miles and precious hours he could spend campaigning in those ‘big states’ that really count.

Granted, those are some pretty big cons, but let’s keep thinking…

Pros:

  • Underneath Alaska’s frozen red political crust, lurks a bubbling blue pool of progressivism not yet seen, but percolating its way upward.
  • The Begich campaign is now touting the fact that national Democrats rate his senate race against Alaska’s State Fossil, Ted Stevens as one of the top four senate races in the country. Wouldn’t a little political love from Barack Obama go a long way in this race which is now a statistical tie in the polls?
  • And yes…there’s Don Young. If Ted Stevens is our aged dottering uncle, then Don Young is surely our embarrasing cousin whose very existence we’d like to deny. Ethan Berkowitz or Diane Benson could benefit from a little Obamamania.

Let’s face it. Alaskan’s get themselves pretty fired up about things that come to Alaska. Elton John springs to mind immediately. And any state that could get itself into such a froth about the opening of a K-Mart store would certainly be more than a little impressed by a pop-in from a political rock star.

We need to flood his in-box, or offer him a free halibut charter, or a tour of the musk ox farm….whatever it takes. Once he sews up the nomination, and presumably the presidency, we can appeal to his sense of self-preservation. Does he really want to spend the next eight years working with these two jamooks? Flipping two of Alaska’s Congressional delegation won’t take much at this point, and a visit from Barack could turn this very small, very BIG state blue!